Yours Truly, Emma.. the unpredictable girl in her unpredictable little world..

This post is for my 2 best girl friends.

Have not been feeling very well these few days... just v depressed and not being myself... well seems like this has been going on for quite some time already..

Was chatting with 2 of my gal friends just now... one of them suddenly asked what i think of her..

First of all, I would like to thank those who ever tolerate my nonsense.. I am a person who may not be what I seem at times.. When i am with a group of people, at times altho it may seem that i am very friendly and talk a lot.. the actual me is actually quite reserved.. i dun usually go and know others.. I get a few funny comments from my 2 gal pals and here are some examples..

1) I like to cling onto my friends and love ones.. Every time when there is a lot of people around me, i will get scared and cling onto them. Yes its true and i have no idea why..

2) My confidence.. yes dearies.. u know me, when i wan something i make sure i work hard for it.. i stand up for my rights and i'm not scared of doing things.. but sad to say, i have changed in this bit as i dunno why.. i can't seem to be as confident as before.

3) i have a glib tongue.. thanks ar.. doesn't mean u cannot outtalk me u call me tt ar haha jk la! If i dun have a glib tongue, wait people bully u how? who will be there to save u.. but me! I should thank god for giving me this talent as it helped me a lot in life. e.g. my job.

4) I get provoked easily.. True.. haha i'm short tempered but den again i forgive people easily too.. guess i am too temperamental..

5) Frankness - yes yes this maybe a good as well as a bad thing depends on how u look at it. Ok i suck at lying to people. I say things i feel although sometimes it hurts other's feelings.. but nowadays i have toned down a lot already.. but nonetheless if let's say i see something wrong, i will not stand there and do nth and let my friends get into deep shit and regret later for not helping..

6) thrifty - ya i know i do shop and buy things but i buy those tt i really wan and like de ok. everytime i will wan to buy a lot of things.. but i only end up with the things i wan or i dun buy. Money is impt to me.. i wanna save for my future.

7) Knowing what i wan.. yes i do not live my life aimlessly.. I have aims and goals that i wanna accomplish. They may not turned out as what i expected but at least i know i have tried and put in all my effort. Life is short. This is a good thing!! i am glad u all can tell that i have aims as it shows that i am really doing it instead of just saying.. coz i nv ever say out what my aims are actually.. lolx

8) Mind of my own - yes i am stubborn and hard to please at times... but no le not really le.. at times i may say but in my heart i am actually v contented le.. i will try to change this bad pt of me maybe life would be much simpler den.

9) I like to complain a lot! haha i am customer service officer le.. everyday hear people complain till i tell u if u need me to lodge a complain for u, i'll be darn good at it knowing what to say and what pts to tackle already.. ya la but i say only nv actually do much.. sometimes i complain coz its the only way to vent my fustration instead of doing silly things.

There are more i know but u girls are so kind to let me off with just this little pts lolx...

There are actually a few inner feelings that i nv say.. just like u all say.. say also wun have a solution. I guess so.. so i've save u all from any further agony.

At times people asked why do i behave this way.. but do they know how much i have been thru in the past? My family, my sec sch life? How horrible people treat me just coz i think differently or how much insults i get just cause i use to be so much fatter. You all nv been thru what i did that's why at times i do put a strong front in order not to get hurt as i am actually very soft hearted and weak. I may not be as lucky as some others and even till today.. those tt i actually care about and treat them v well take me for granted and nv spare a thought for my feelings. Well i guess humans are selfish.. they just wan themselves to be happy.. and tt includes myself.. I wun blame them but just try to understand why they are feeling this way and still be there even though they might nv appreciate a single thing ever. I will just patiently wait for the day to come when they realised everything i have done.. but even if they dun, its ok.. at least i tried my best and i wun turn back and regret not doing anything at all in the first place.

Now is my turn to rant abt my 2 best gal pals.

Girl 1
To you.. yes u know who u are..
I'm very happy to know you.. and thank god for letting me know you.. when i'm sad or i cry, i know although u may not know what to say to me or understand why i am feeling this way but u still got console me..
As for how you are, yea i do admit at times i dunno what you are thinking about.. things u say sometimes seem funny and lame.. ooh ya ur jokes tt is.. not funny de le... but nonetheless i still love u. Thanks for being there to listen to me.. Thanks for being there for me during my bday.. and thanks for keep on asking me to drink alcoholic drink ah~~ hahaha dun bluff!!!!!!! Will always remember the times we 2 go watch scary movies. As much as we are scared, both of us still wanna watch and everytime we watch, we pray that the movie will end soon. *hugx*

Girl 2
As for the other siao one.. haha yes u are crazy at times also.. we both are strong headed individual.. altho in the past we do not see eye to eye in a lot of things but at least now we do! both of us are starting to do stupid things already e.g. shopping online at 3am... maybe we should one day punch all the stupid tikopehs at the swimming pool... haha and yes shopping!! i think we need tt a lot haha.. be it online shopping or movies... ooh ya talk abt movies.. nx time will tie u to the chair when we watch scary movies.. haha den we can watch without being scared by u instead of the movie. Girl, u are my slimming role model and also of coz make up la dressing too. Always got tips will share de.. dun complain so much abt urself le.. you are v beautiful liao.. u should help us improve!! haha.. *hugx*

love u 2 girls!

I wanna go ktv.. sing my heart out.. altho at times u girls see that i maybe laughing, but i'm sure u can feel deep inside me i maybe actually crying.. Girl 1 should know more of this as in the past i did tell u before of how i feel abt relationships and stuff. u girls should know how much i love this guy. As much as i wanna move on, it still hurts deep and thanks for being so understanding. I wanna be the old bubbly me.. to be happy inside and out.. just pray tt i can do it soon ok?