Yours Truly, Emma.. the unpredictable girl in her unpredictable little world..

Haha i just need to rant rant and rant!

I accidentally slit my wrist today!! heng its not a deep cut if not i think i'm like so dead... what happened was that a piece of sharp edged paper cut my wrist.. so pain.. sobx.. why nv cut deeper den i die better sobx haha

Lotsa things happened these days.. I feel happy, sad, down, up, all sorts of mixed feelings..

Happy - I guess i can't elaborate much abt this but at least its something tt keeps me going... but haikx.. i dunno la...

Sad - I guess its cause i think too much.. way too much for everything.. tts so me right.. it sux!

Mixed feelings - Basically this involves friendship as well as other factors.. makes me so luan in my life again.. makes me scared as well.. ooh well to things tt makes me upset, leave me alone~ Don't bother me! lolx

Friends are worth knowing as well as keep. but please do not make use of me or make me realised tt all along u are making use of me for a certain reason.

Nowadays I am thinking what kinda guys do i really hate.. i guess its those who are real shallow and yet they think they are not... ooh please!

Not everyone is born pretty, slim, smart, sexy whateva! No one's perfect..

I'm not pointing fingers at anyone but just making a general remark on things tt i see around me..

*sighx* how i wish there's someone out there who will love me the way i am... provided i must love tt guy too la! but why why why i just always dun dare to admit to a guy i like! Why do i always sit there and wait for tt certain someone to initiate first? Maybe coz i'm scared.. not only scared to be rejected but also scared to lose a friend.. I know myself.. i am not those who break off a friendship after finding out a particular guy likes me.. I got real life examples de ok!

Better start praying to god and wish he will grant my wishes!!!

Ooh ya btw i went to Jasmine's wedding on thursday! 05/05/05! Cool date right? haha well 05/05/05 is also officially declared by me for a certain someone.. Anyway! Jasmine is my god-ma! and i love her so much! She really cares and take care of me.. listen to my problems.. At times when i am upset, she will give me a hug and i feel better.. I am v happy she is married now.. mind u she is not old ok.. just tt i happen to be my colleagues' baby.. so haha i got a few mummies ard.. The food was fantastic.. Seeing how happy she is makes me think how happy i was in the past when i have someone special to share my life with..

Its not easy to find someone who can make u feel complete.. why hesitate den? Lots of people ard me tells me they found someone who makes them real happy and complete but i dunno what's holding them back.. girls.. dun be too picky ok.. but den again it also depends if the other party feels the same too.. sighx! Why do things have to be so complicated?? Well all i have to say is yes it maybe depending on fate and all but! you have to persue ur own happiness too! If you let someone slip outta ya hands, no matter got what fate, you'll nv get what u deserve coz u nv treasure.. girls girls.. u can tell me tt u can so totally be urself ard tt someone... don't later u end up with someone who u have to endure with the rest of ya lives or tt u end up with someone who u can nv be urself when u are ard them.. and yes! take ur time! but if the person gets attached le dun come kp to me say why u nv take action earlier ar! anyway i love u all!

By the way, I am giving myself 6 weeks to jian fei! why six? Dunno.. just give la! I dun wanna be chubby anymore! I must do it!! its for my own good!!!! Den i can kick all da stupid guys out there who judged me on how i look instead my personality! *puix*

I want my happiness!! Gimme!!! *!@#!@#*